God tell's Mike "If you want to get into heaven, you must give up Sex, smoking and drinking" 2 weeks later God speaks to Mike and ask's " Have you given everything up that I asked?" Mike replied " Well giving up the smoking and the drinking was easy, but, when my wife bent over the freezer to get some meat out, her skirt hitched up and presnted me with her cute little arse, I couldn't help myself, I shagged the arse off her" God replied " They don't like that sort of thing in Heaven" and Mike said " No, they don't like that sort of thing in the grocery store either!!!"