Some Quotes On Politics, Politicians, and Government: "The reason there are so few female politicians is that it is too much trouble to put makeup on two faces" "Politics is made up largely of irrelevancies." "Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it whether it exists or not, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy." "Being in politics is like being a football coach. You have to be smart enough to understand the game, and dumb enough to think it's important.

" "The word 'politics' is derived from the word 'poly', meaning 'many', and the word 'ticks', meaning 'blood sucking parasites'." "Crime does not pay .. as well as politics." "Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.

" "Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

" "Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job." "Get all the fools on your side and you can be elected to anything." "Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river." "I once said cynically of a politician, 'He'll doublecross that bridge when he comes to it.'" "An honest politician is one who, when he is bought, will stay bought." "For every action there is an equal and opposite government program." "Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." "The mystery of government is not how Washington works but how to make it stop." "Disbelief in magic can force a poor soul into believing in government and business.

" "It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong." "I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts." "The marvel of all history is the patience with which men and women submit to burdens unnecessarily laid upon them by their governments.

" "The problem with political jokes is they get elected."